


Dear John

by Gumnut



Series: Tales of Sotto Voce [3]
Category: Thunderbirds
Genre: Angst, Gen, Humor, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-10
Updated: 2018-09-10
Packaged: 2019-07-10 14:51:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15951593
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gumnut/pseuds/Gumnut
Summary: ‘It hurt so much. I couldn’t do what he asked, so he just hurt me more. And then I think he just hurt me because he could. There wasn’t any way out. And he looked just like you. I think that hurt the most.’





	Dear John

**Author's Note:**

> Title: Dear John  
> Tales of Sotto Voce  
> Author: Gumnut  
> 9-10 Sep 2018  
> Fandom: Thunderbirds Are Go 2015/ Thunderbirds TOS  
> Rating: Teen  
> Summary: ‘It hurt so much. I couldn’t do what he asked, so he just hurt me more. And then I think he just hurt me because he could. There wasn’t any way out. And he looked just like you. I think that hurt the most.’  
> Word count: 3082  
> Spoilers & warnings: Spoilers for Season 2 and Sotto Voce  
> Author’s note: This one is a little different. It is set shortly after Virgil wakes up on the third day. Things aren’t great for anyone. I hope you enjoy it :D  
> Disclaimer: Mine? You’ve got to be kidding. Money? Don’t have any, don’t bother.

**Message from OntheVirg.**

_Dear John._

_I don’t really know where to start other than to say that I am so sorry. This is not your fault and I know I’m hurting you. If I could stop I would._

_I miss you, little brother, please don’t doubt that ever. This thing that bastard has done to me has come between us, but I still love you (yes, I said it, you can now poke fun) and we will get through it. Somehow._

_I’m having a hell of a time talking at the moment, so even if I could bear to be in the same room with you, having a conversation would be difficult. Would you mind if we swapped words using the message system? A little odd to be pen pals when we are only a couple of rooms away, but I’m hoping it will help. And I miss you._

_Your brother,  
Virgil._

John stared at the message and something inside him broke. He knew the state his brother was in. He was still confined to the infirmary, could barely walk due to dizzy spells, could barely speak, and was wracked with emotional instability, his brain struggling to right itself after the attack.

Yet, he had managed to write this?

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_Certainly, Virgil._

_I think it is a good idea. It is likely to help us regain our relationship._

_It is also great to see you able to write so well, considering your condition. I am very happy to hear from you._

_And yes, I love you, too. No poking required._

_I am also so sorry this has happened to you. I would offer some regrets, but I cannot see any way that we could have honestly prevented it. Looking back reveals so many opportunities, yet given the same situations with the same information at the time, we would have acted in exactly the same manner. It appears the Hood planned well for once in his life and he almost succeeded._

_The only element that he didn’t plan for was you. It is you we have to thank for his failure. I have never been more thankful for your stubborn streak in my life._

_I’m am so proud to have such a strong big brother._

_John._

He hit send and bit his lip. He wouldn’t list personal relations in his list of best skills, but Virgil knew that. He just hoped he was good enough.

Several hours later, John was startled out of the sub-function he was writing by a chime from his tablet.

**Message from OntheVirg.**

_John._

_Thank you for your vote of confidence. To be honest all I could think of at the time was that I couldn’t let you have my ship. You yelled and screamed, but no, you couldn’t have her. Then you hurt me, tried to force me, but no_

_Sorry, wasn’t you._

_V_

It was to be expected. John was surprised the message had even been sent and not deleted. Perhaps Virgil had hit the wrong button. Or perhaps he was trying to explain.

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_Virgil._

_There are no words for the extent of the anger I feel for the violation made against you. There is no need to apologise. I understand, big brother._

_Please if you need to talk. I am here._

_John_

He swallowed and hit send.

**Message from OntheVirg.**

_Do you remember that deer Dad found on the side of the road that had been hit by a car? How it looked up at us desperate for help, but somehow knew it wasn’t going to come?_

_It felt like that._

_It hurt so much. I couldn’t do what he asked, so he just hurt me more. And then I think he just hurt me because he could. There wasn’t any way out._

_And he looked just like you. I think that hurt the most._

_V_

He had to resist the urge to run down the hallway and hug his brother. He rubbed his eyes instead.

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_I really wish I could hug you right now. Tell Scott to give you a hug from me._

_Do you know why he looked like me?_

_John_

**Message from TheFlyingScottsman.**

_Hug delivered._

_You okay?_

_S_

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_As well as I could be considering the circumstances. How is he?_

_John._

**Message from TheFlyingScottsman.**

_Struggling to type. We’re going to have to call it quits soon. It is taking everything he has to hit those keys. But I think he needs this._

_Thank you for being there._

_How goes the programming?_

_S_

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_Don’t let him overtax himself._

_Where else would I be? He is my big brother._

_Slowly. Whoever did this really knew what they were doing. It is cutting edge work. I can guarantee that the Hood outsourced it. Far too smart for him. I recommend we set Penelope and Kayo on their tail. I dread to think what else this person could be capable of doing. Brains has already started the groundwork to protect our systems. We have a long road ahead to get our equipment up to a level I will be happy to let out on the field without fear of compromise._

_I’m afraid International Rescue is down for the count for the foreseeable future._

_John._

**Message from TheFlyingScottsman.**

_Damn. I still had hope for a magic wand. Do your best. I know you will._

_Oh, and if you need to talk, let me know. Virgil isn’t the only victim here._

_S_

**Message from OntheVirg**

_Gonna have to stop soon. Tired._

_I have thought about that and I’m not sure. Have you ever met the Hood? I don’t think you have. So I’m wondering how on Earth he knew what you looked like._

_But then perhaps he didn’t have to know. Perhaps the program just needed to source the most likely person in my head it could use. You are unique, little brother. Because you spend so much time on TB5, I mostly see you as a hologram. That would be extremely convenient for a mole._

_In any case, I fell for it._

_V_

**Message from TheFlyingScottsman.**

_He’s asleep._

_You know, watching him, I can see why the Hood didn’t win. He won’t give up. By the end of his last message his hands were shaking so badly, I had to help him tap the right keys. Wouldn’t let me do it for him, no, he had to do it himself._

_We are so damn lucky to have him for a brother._

_S_

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_I know._

_J_

**Message from TheFlyingScottsman.**

_Johnny?_

He was still sitting, staring down at his tablet when Scott entered the room behind him. He continued to stare as his brother’s hands took away the tablet and placed on the shelf beside him. When a hand was placed gently on his shoulder he finally looked up into those caring blue eyes.

It was enough to break him again.

For the first time in many years, his biggest brother drew him gently into a hug. John let his forehead drop to the soft material of Scott’s shirt and simply clung.

-o-o-o-

**Message from OntheVirg.**

_Roses are red_  
We wear blue  
I look groovy  
And so do you.

**Message from OntheVirg.**

_There once was a flyboy named Scott_  
Who used to fly around a lot  
He flew so fast  
He kissed his own ass  
And completely lost the plot.

**Message from OntheVirg.**

_And then there was one named John_  
Whose appendages were quite long  
In space he was ace  
Full of delicate grace  
But in gravity everything went wrong.

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_GORDON, GET OFF VIRGIL’S TABLET!_

-o-o-o-

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_You there, Virgil?_

**Message from LikeaVirgil.**

_Yeah._

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_How are you?_

**Message from LikeaVirgil.**

_Been better._

**Message from GuyintheSky**.

_Scott with you?_

**Message from LikeaVirgil.**

_No. I sent him to bed. He looked awful. Please make sure he looks after himself. You know what he is like when one of us is injured._

**Message from GuyintheSky**.

_I’ve been trying, but he is slippery. Any tips?_

**Message from LikeaVirgil.**

_Don’t take no for an answer and, if necessary, manhandle_.

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_I don’t exactly have your physique, Virgil_.

**Message from LikeaVirgil.**

_Out logic him then. He does see sense occasionally._

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_I’ll try._

_Virgil, I had an idea about how we could see each other. Do you remember my prom?_

**Message from LikeaVirgil**.

_Really?!! You’d try that again?_

**Message from GuyintheSky**.

_Do you think it would help?_

**Message from LikeaVirgil**.

_Honestly, John, I don’t know. Maybe. It is certainly a fond memory, for me, if not for you. Would you really do that for me?_

**Message from GuyintheSky**.

_Of course. It will grow back and maybe that could help you ease back into seeing me?_

**Message from LikeaVirgil.**

_You would really go that far?_

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_Wouldn’t you?_

**Message from LikeaVirgil.**

_Maybe._

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_I know you better than that._

**Message from LikeaVirgil.**

_It is asking a lot. Are you sure?_

**Message from LittleSpaceballs**

_John._

_Can you please give Gordon access to his tablet. He is driving me insane._

_A_

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_Yes, Virgil. Give me a moment. Alan is throwing a hissy._

**Message from GuyintheSky**.

_No, Alan._

**Message from LittleSpaceballs**.

_Then at least change my username for me. He’s locked me out of my settings and his sense of humour leaves much to be desired._

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_Sure._

**Message from TheShortestOne.**

_Thanks, John. Yours isn’t much better._

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_Now you lack the balls._

**Message from TheShortestOne.**

_You’re not safe on your little satellite at the moment, John. Remember that._

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_Go and see Virgil. He needs the company._

**Message from TheShortestOne.**

_How is he doing?_

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_Go and ask him. I’m sure he would love to see you._

**Message from TheShortestOne.**

_I guess._

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_Have you gone to see him at all?_

**Message from TheShortestOne.**

_I’ve been busy._

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_Alan._

**Message from TheShortestOne.**

_Okay._

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_Alan._

**Message from TheShortestOne.**

_I hate seeing him like that._

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_We all hate seeing him like that. This isn’t about us, it is about him. He sacrificed so much to protect us, the least you can do is visit him while he is recovering. He’ll be missing you. You know what he is like._

**Message from TheShortestOne.**

_I know._

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_Get Gordon to go with you if it will help._

**Message from TheShortestOne.**

_Maybe._

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_Alan, do you have any idea how much I would like to walk in and see Virgil right now? But I can’t. Move your ass and go see him._

**Message from LikeaVirgil.**

_Everything okay?_

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_Yeah, Alan is just being Alan._

**Message from LikeaVirgil.**

_He tends to do that. Being Alan and all._

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_Ha ha._

**Message from LikeaVirgil.**

_So you are going to try it?_

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_Yeah._

**Message from LikeaVirgil.**

_I’ll owe you big time, Johnny._

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_No, you won’t._

**Message from LikeaVirgil.**

_Do I get to keep proof?_

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_I’m sure Gordon will oblige - at a factor of approximately one thousand._

**Message from LikeaVirgil.**

_It will be painful. You have my sympathies. Speak of the devil, the terrible two are here. Speak to you later?_

**Message from GuyintheSky**.

_Of course. And you have my sympathies too. Yell if it becomes unbearable._

-o-o-o-

**Message from EatYourVirgetables.**

_Fgxzs_

**Message from GuyintheSky**

_Virgil?_

When his brother didn’t answer, John pulled up the video feed from his room. Virgil was not in his bed, the covers ruffled and discarded.

Frowning John scanned the room. For a moment he thought it was empty, but no. Right on the very edge of the camera field, a hand lay across a discarded tablet on the floor.

He hit his comm. “Scott, get to the infirmary, now!” And he was moving.

He didn’t know exactly where in the building Scott was, but John was close. He dashed down the corridor, tore around the corner...and Scott had beat him to it.

Virgil was on the floor, distressed and disoriented, struggling to get up. Scott knelt beside him, his hands on his brother’s shoulders muttering reassurances.

John slipped back into the shadows. He could not be seen. Certainly not when Virgil was in this state.

“It was a nightmare. Only a dream.”

“It h-rts. G-d, it h-rts.” There were unshed tears in his brother’s voice, a shaking hand fumbling at his temple. “Mk it g ‘way.”

“I-I can’t, Virg. I’m so sorry.”

Virgil let out a sob. “Why? Why d-s he w-nt to h-rt m?

“Because he was a self-serving bastard who would do anything to get what he wants.” The venom in Scott’s tone startled Virgil.

“J-hn?”

Oh, god.

“No! John would never-“

“H-rts.”

Scott drew his brother close, rocking him gently, desperately trying to calm him down.

John slipped back into the corridor and headed back to his room, heart in pieces.

-o-o-o-

**Message from TheMightyFish.**

_John?_

**Message from TheMightyFish.**

_Johnny?_

**Message from TheMightyFish.**

_Jooooooooohhhhhhhnnnnnnnnnnyyyyyy._

**Message from TheMightyFish.**

_I really don’t like being ignored. You haven’t answered your comms and your door is locked. C’mon, John. We’re worried about you._

**Message from TheMightyFish.**

_John. John. John. John. John._

**Message from TheMightyFish.**

_Please John. I really don’t want to have to deploy Scott, he looks like shit._

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_What do you want, Gordon?_

**Message from TheMightyFish.**

_You okay?_

**Message from GuyintheSky.**

_I’m fine._

**Message from TheMightyFish.**

_Don’t believe you. This all sucks big time. Let me in, pleeease._

**Message from TheMightyFish**

_C’mon, John. We need each other in this._

John sighed and walking out of his bathroom, opened the door. Sure enough, Gordon was standing outside, tablet in hand, worry on his face.

“What’s wrong?”

“I should be asking you that question, bro. You look almost as bad as Scott.”

“Well, plenty of reason.” He sighed. “Is he okay?”

“Who?”

“Scott. Virgil. Pick a brother. Everyone is hurting.”

Gordon looked at him for a moment as if he was going to say something, but then decided against. Instead he took the opportunity to push past John and into his room. “What are you doing in here anyway?”

“Gordon-“

“What?! You’re going to dye your hair???” His little brother let out a laugh. “This will be good.” He grabbed the packet. “Blond? Do anything to be me, huh?” The humour in his brother’s eyes was definitely infectious.

“I’m hoping it will help.”

Gordon immediately sobered. He looked down at the packet. “Prom?”

“Yeah.”

“That sucked.”

“Yes, it did.”

Gordon reached up and patted his shoulder. “Hope it works better than it did last time.”

John looked down a moment. “Hey, Gordon. Do me a favour?”

“Anything, bro.”

“Can I borrow one of your shirts?”

Gordon cracked up. “Anything to be me.”

-o-o-o-

**Message from EverVirgilant.**

_You ready?_

**Message from LongJohnBlondie.**

_Are you?_

**Message from EverVirgilant.**

_Scott’s here, and Gordon. Dunno where Alan is. We have enough troops should I lose it._

**Message from LongJohnBlondie.**

_You are not going to lose it. Do me a favour and cuff Gordon about the ears for me. I don’t know how he_ _has changed my username this time, but even I’m locked out now._

**Message from EverVirgilant.**

_Cuff deployed. Consider yourself scowled at. I’ll speak to Brains later. See if I can get his font to appear pink_ _with flowers and fairies._

**Message from LongJohnBlondie.**

_Sounds great._

**Message from EverVirgilant.**

_Now get your ass in here._

-o-o-o-

Scott was tired. But that seemed to be the permanent state of affairs since his brother had been injured. He was wary of this experiment, but agreed that it was worth the try. Virgil missed John, and John was going through his own version of hell in this, so if it helped just a little, it would help a lot.

Gordon dashed back into the room, a grin on his face. “Awesome. Totally awesome.”

Scott glared at him, but his grin would not be subdued.

He reached for Virgil’s hand. Simple reassurance.

Virgil’s voice was hesitant. “C-m in, J-hn.”

The middle brother edged around the doorway, and Scott felt Virgil tense.

Oh my god.

His tall lanky brother had cut his hair short and dyed blond. He had obviously shoved a pile of product into it and it stood up in messy spikes. On top of that he was sporting a pair of John Lennon sunglasses, conveniently hiding his eyes.

One of Gordon’s just a little too small, blindingly colourful shirts hung from his shoulders, leaving just a hint of bare skin at his waistline. Low hung burgundy linen pants and leather sandals finished off the ensemble.

So far from their John that a new man stood in the room.

“J-hn?” Virgil’s voice cracked.

John attempted a grin.

Virgil succeeded. “Yu l-k gr-t.” Scott started as Virgil suddenly pushed aside his covers and clambered out of bed. He steadied him as he wavered predictably, but let him go as he hesitantly approached his little brother.

His shoulders were tense, but he reached out and laid a hand on John’s chest. “H-w r yu?”

Quiet and still tentative. “Getting better by the minute.”

Virgil looked up at him, a mess of emotion on his face.

“How are you, Virgil?”

Whispered. “G-ttig b-tter b the m-nut.” He swallowed, then leaping in, closed his eyes and wrapped his arms around his little brother. “M-ssed yu.”

John gently returned the embrace. “Missed you, too.”

Scott swallowed as something caught in his throat.

They stood there for a moment before Virgil broke it off, stumbling a little and backing off. Gordon caught him and led him back to the bed.

John stayed where he was standing as his big brother sat back down on the bed. Scott grabbed a hand. “You okay?”

Virgil smiled up at him. “Ye, I th-k I am.”

The biggest brother in the room broke into a grin and tightened his grip. He looked up at John and finally saw a hesitant smile on the man’s face.

They had made a beginning.

-o-o-o-

**Message from ScottyWantaCracker.**

_GORDON!_

**Message from TheVirgilQueen**

_What has he done now?_

**Message from HeWhoLooksUpSkirtsBecauseHeisTooShorttoLookDownShirts**

_What the hell?!_

**Message from BlondHippyandLippy**

_He’s in the pool._

**Message from ScottyWantaCracker.**

_I’m going to drain the damn thing!_

**Message from SleekSilverandFoxy.**

_I’ll take care of it._

 

#Username reset

**ScottTracy**

**VirgilTracy**

**JohnTracy**

**AlanTracy**

**GroovyGrandma**

**GordonisGrovelling.**

-o-o-o-

FIN.


End file.
